Cancer go away.

The news is not good today. When someone is diagnosed with cancer, and there seem to be so many of us now, it does not diminish the initial response when you find out someone else has cancer. The news is still a shock to the spirit, a moment where the breath catches and pauses out of rythmn, and the heart drops into another pool of sadness. As a cancer survivor, you know what is to come for the newly diagnosed, not just the physical, but the mental, the emotional and the spiritual effects for the cancer patient and those who love them.

Cancer. I hate this disease.

You have just learned you have cancer, and I am surviving cancer. With all my heart, I want you to survive cancer too. I walk back through my mind, retracing my footsteps from the day of my cancer diagnosis to this, remembering all the things I did that might have tipped the scales in favor of my living and not dying. I cannot say I know the one thing that it might have been, or the combination of things I might have done, so I want to remember it all. I want to share all of it with you. I want you to be able to tip the scales in favor of life and not death too.

Here is how I approached my diagnosis of cancer, these are the perspectives I held and the steps I took during my cancer treatments and healing. Maybe there is something in all of it that matters, that made a difference, that if you know too, will help you in your healing too.

Believe in your healers. Look for compassion. Someone who has time to listen. Someone who has time to answer your questions. Listen to your intuition when you meet with them, feel what your intuition is telling you. If you do not believe in your healers, keep looking until you find the healers you can believe in. Then have faith they will do everything they can, as expertly as they can, to help you heal. Let them know you will be doing everything you can to help yourself heal, while they are doing everything they can to help you heal.

Know you have options. You may not like most of your options, but you have options. Do not allow yourself to believe you are helpless to choose, change or affect the outcome of the challenge before you. Take your time. Research all the options offered to you, and when you are sure they are the right ones for you, then consent to the procedure and treatment.

The surgeon, the oncologist, the radiologist, the chemotherapy nurse, the plastic surgeon, the oncology social worker, all the healers and healthcare workers, have been trained to do the jobs they do, and most likely you have not been trained in any of these specialities. It can be impressive what they can do. But you can learn about what they are planning for you, and the reasons why, and you can know that of the entire group of healers, you are the most impressive in what you can do, while they are doing their jobs.

Get the nutrition facts. Find out what others are saying in relation to cancer and nutrition. Some cancer patients begin to follow a macrobiotic diet, some become vegetarians, some simply begin eating organic whenever possible, and prepackaged and processed never. Unfortunately, the U.S. is the fast food nation, and the convenience of our foods are laced with chemical additives, hormones and antibiotics. We are what we eat, and our food supply is based on food industry profit, not personal nutritional value. Because I wanted to achieve balance, I adopted a habit of eating based on the glycemic index diet to maintain even blood sugar levels, follow the Mediterranean diet pyramid, eat as much organic as I can find, and prepare all my food from scratch. I will not eat anything with transfat.

Beware the quacks and snake oil salesmen. There are the unscrupulous selling empty promises by preying on the vulnerable and frightened. Be skeptical, cynical and cautious. But do not dismiss centuries old traditions like Ayreveda, Chinese Medicine, yoga, acupuncture, meditation, massage, talk therapy, support groups, visualization and the power of prayer. You can integrate many of these into any conventional medical treatments you choose to treat your cancer.

Let it go. All the deep down inside loneliness, the memories of abandonment, the coldness, the resentments, the anger, the grudges, the memories of any physical and emotional injury, that may have happened in the past. I sat and wrote letters, long letters to each person I had a difficulty with at any point in my life. I wrote and wrote and wrote until I had nothing else to say, and I said it all. Then I ceremonially built a fire in the woodstove and watched each letter burn until it was pure ash. Until it was gone. And I walked away.

Know you are not alone. Even if you do not believe in guardian angels, go ahead and know you have at least one with you at all times. Looking out for you, at all times, and has been with you before you were born. Believe you are loved, completely and unconditionally loved, and that you always have been, even in the times you may not have felt you were loved. Keep telling yourself you were always loved, are loved now, and will always be loved. You were never, and are not now, and never will be, alone. I kept telling myself this throughout the day, each day, and did not bother to question whether I believed it or not. Sometimes I think I short circuited an internal belief system of deprivation so deeply embedded within my consciousness I was unaware it existed on a conscious level. One day it occured to me, I not only knew these statements to be true, I realized I truly, and finally, believed I was loved. Love has been with me ever since, and I have never felt alone. Love, providence and grace are my constant companions. I am saying they are yours too, in the concept comfortable for you to believe in, in case you do not know it already.

Never accept blame. Do not blame yourself or allow others to suggest that somehow you caused your cancer. Accept responsibility for the changes you can make to help with your healing, but I repeat, never accept blame from yourself or others. In Healing Words by Larry Dossey, Saints and Sinners, Health and Healers, he notes that many great spiritual leaders have suffered ignominious ends marked by grotesque pain and suffering. Saint Bernadette, died of bone cancer. Jiddu Krishnamurti, died of pancreatic cancer. Suzuki Roshi, who brought Zen Buddhism to the U.S., died of liver cancer. The list goes on and on. And sickly saints are mirrored by what we could call healthy reprobates -- individuals who have no obvious spiritual inclinations whatsoever, who break all the rules of good health, smoke and drink with abandon, and live to be a hundred without ever falling ill. Simply accept and understand there is a great mystery here to life and we are standing in the middle of it. Illness is not a punishment.

Rediscover time. Find ways to be in the present moment, to observe the beauty surrounding you, to breath in the tranquility of being in the moment. Spend time in nature. Make time for yourself. Do the things that make you feel good, that give you a sense of renewal and enthusiasm.

Set aside time each day to collect inspirational quotes, prayers and stories of healing. Write these down on slips of paper. Create a healing shrine for yourself. Mine sat on my bedside table, and I kept my slips of paper of quotes, prayers and stories of healing in a beautiful little treasure box. I placed in my healing shrine, photos and momentos that had great personal meaning to me, that represented a tender love or pleasant memory. I kept a small blue velvet drawstring bag filled with the slips of paper of the prayers I felt were most powerful for me, so that when I had to travel or be in surgery or treatment, I had inspiration with me.

Plan for the future. Make a list of all the things you would like to do in your life, that perhaps you have put off or felt you did not have time to do, and all the places you would like to see, and then make step by step plans on how to do and see all that is on your list. Take the time to make a long list. Add to your list as time goes on. Keep an open mind that you will have all the time you need to accomplish every item on your list. There is no rush, no hurry. You will have the time you need.

Avoid toxic people. We all have them in our life, and we all know who they are, and we put up with them. They are the people, who on the surface may appear nice, but whenever we spend time with them, we leave the experience feeling bad somehow. If you cannot avoid these people, mentally visualize a white protective light surrounding you and protecting you when you are in their presence, that protects you from their energy.

Fill your environment with colors you love, aromas you adore, art and books that move your soul, people you hold most dear. Honor yourself at all times, and celebrate your life continuously.

From the Institute of Noetic Sciences, here is a list of some of the characteristics associated with remission and survival that cancer survivors are reporting:

1. A change from dependency to autonomy combined with activities, attitudes, and behaviors that promote increased autonomy, awareness of themselves, others, and their environment, love, joy, playfulness, satisfaction, laughter, and humor.

2. Facing the crisis, the despair, the sadness, and the pain and discovering they have the power to find a new way of life that is fulfilling and meaningful.

3. Taking control of their lives, personally, professionally, emotional, spiritually, and medically, and living each day fully combined with a willingness to evaluate their beliefs and attitudes and change old beliefs and attitudes that are no longer appropriate or adequate.

4. Becoming comfortable with and expressing and accepting both their positive and negative emotions/feelings, their needs, wants, and desires, physical, emotional, spiritual; the ability to say "No" when it is necessary for their well being.

5. Having at least one strong loving relationship-a strong connection to another person, an activity, an organization(s), changing the quality of their interpersonal relationships with spouses, friends, family, neighbors, doctors, nurses, etc. in a positive way, and motivation to help others.

6. Working in partnership with their physicians and participating in decisions related to their health and well being.

7. Finding meaning in the experience of cancer, finding reasons to live, accepting the diagnosis but not the prognosis, seeing the disease as a challenge, belief in a positive outcome, and having a renewed desire, will and commitment to life.

8. Choosing activities and practices that promote increased awareness and reduce stress (imagery, stress reduction, yoga, etc.); showing renewed spiritual awareness (Soul) that often results in a spiritual practice (prayer, meditation, religious affiliation, connection to nature, etc.).

Cancer. Just go away. Stop threatening to take any more people away.

Cancer Go Away was originally published in an obscure little blog of mine last year. Because I am sure most of the readers to The Cancer Blog never visited my personal blog, I am sharing it here. Another friend has just been diagnosed with cancer. Each time, I think of what I wrote in Cancer Go Away.