Jack Osbourne, son of rock legend Ozzy and colon cancer survivor Sharon Osbourne, recently stated that he blames his alcohol and drug addiction on his father. During his mother Sharon's diagnosis and treatment for colon cancer, the young Jack used alcohol and the powerfully addictive prescription painkiller OxyContin as a way to cope. Jack is quoted as saying, "My problems peaked when mom was sick and dad was dealing with his problems the same way as I was, by drinking, so I had no one to turn to. I was just hanging out with my crowd drinking and doing drugs." Jack ended up in an addiction rehab clinic to get clean and sober.
This is no way excuses the badly-decided choices that Jack made when he turned to alcohol and drugs as a way to cope with his feelings, but there is a sharp focus and more than a bit of snarkiness to the news reports concerning Jack's blaming comment that misses a great opportunity in regard to discussing the impact a parent's cancer diagnosis has on children.
As the American Cancer Society (ACS) states, "Families face many complex issues when one of their members has cancer. There will probably be a time during a family's experience with cancer when psychosocial support services will be helpful in meeting the emotional needs of the family. There are teams of experts, each with a different focus, who offer support and are trained in how cancer affects a family." ACS offers a terrific resource for the family with the online publication of Helping Children When A Family Member Has Cancer.
The Family Doctor states, "Every person has a different way of handling news that a loved one has cancer. Many people react with shock, disbelief and even anger when they're first given the news." The Family Doctor's Cancer: Helping Your Family Help You offers advice on different questions a parent might have, such as:
- How will my family react to the news that I have cancer?
- Should I tell my children that I have cancer?
- How do I tell my children that I have cancer?
- How can I help my children cope with their feelings?
In the ACS online resource for families, it states, "Parents can have a powerful effect on how their children react to a crisis in the family. In the beginning this responsibility can feel like a huge weight, but it is possible for family members to learn how to deal with and even grow through the experience of having cancer in the family."
Support services can include individual counseling, family counseling, and support groups. If you do not know where to start, ask your physician or call the local hospital or local ACS office. Someone will be able to help you help your children, and all family members, navigate through the crisis of cancer, so that everyone becomes a survivor of cancer in the best way possible.
1. I agree cancer does change the way we percieve life overall. I was diagnosed in 2002 with breast cancer and my first thought was for my family and not myself. It was as though no matter what.... they can not survive without me. I am African American and the numbers don't fair as well with our population as it relates to survival. I was originally diagnosed as stage three. I knew I had to tell my children, I had no husband and wondered how I would work and take care of them while going through treatment (Surgery, Chemo, & Radiation). I needed every treatment there was pretty much and would lose my income totally while I fought for my life. I think that mental clarity was lost somewhere in between do I eat or do I sleep? And who's going to pay the rent? In my case I think the burden of socio-economic depression rest some where between missing two pay checks and trying to feed your children. Figuring out if the depression orginally triggered by a diagnoses or situational circumstance, however valid, will utimately effect the Will to live, the outcome and the quality of life. I am sympatheic to the needs of others with cancer. I run a support group now at a local hospital.
Posted at 11:43PM on Jan 8th 2007 by Antionette