I'm in another hospital lobby -- this time waiting while my three-year-old son has surgery to repair a hernia.

So I'm back to reading a magazine. This time I brought my own not-so-outdated publication -- The Oprah Magazine, April 2007. And as I sit here flipping and turning the pages, there is so much I want to tell you.

I'll be back with more. But for now, think about this:

"...see how the flesh grows back
across a wound, with a great vehemence,
more strong
than the simple, untested surface before.
There's a name for it on horses,
when it comes back darker and raised: proud flesh.
as all flesh
is proud of its wounds, wears them
as honors given out after battle,
small triumphs pinned to the chest."

Jane Hirshfield, From What Binds Us

I have a few small triumphs pinned to my chest -- they show in the form of surgery scars and radiation tattoos and puckered skin where a port once lived. Proud flesh. Stronger than the once untested surface. My honors for having survived a battle.

I never colored my hair -- until after cancer, when my once-blond hair lost to chemotherapy grew in mousy brown with touches of gray. I thought it needed some spark and dazzle so I doused my head -- and my bathroom counter and walls too -- with hair dye in an effort to brighten up my look. It worked. And I like it. But I don't like what I've now heard about a possible link between hair dye and cancer. And this is what I told a reporter from the New York Times who called me the other day. She had read my post here on the Cancer Blog about this news story -- about hair dye and cancer -- and she wanted to know more about my personal feelings as a cancer survivor and as a person with colored hair.

I told this reporter that it's a bit ironic that in 36 years, I had never applied hair dye to my hair and that only after cancer did I take the plunge -- only to learn that hair dye may be cancer causing. I told her that I wouldn't do it again -- dye my hair -- although I don't think one application of coloring chemicals will really affect me when research indicates a risk only when women use hair dye 12 or more times. But still, I don't choose to take even the smallest of risks when it comes to my health -- which has already been compromised once. I told the reporter that I have not witnessed any widespread panic among the public about this issue. And I think the people I know who color their hair will continue to do so. That's okay with me. Because when it comes down to it, I am responsible for my hair only, my health only, my life only. That's really all I can manage.

And once my colored hair grows out -- the colored hair that was photographed today for the story this reporter is writing -- I'll manage to live on with my mousy brown hair with natural gray highlights. It won't have much spark or dazzle. But it will be safe.

Drugs appear to be quite a slippery slope for bodybuilders, taking a second drug to offset the unwanted side effects of the first drug. According to University of Glamorgan researchers, 22 percent of bodybuilders use Tamoxifen because steroid use causes breast growth.

Tamoxifen has a few potentially serious life-threatening side-effects such as deep vein blood clotting and the increased risk for the development of new tumors.

Women breast cancer survivors often struggle over whether the benefit of taking Tamoxifen overweigh the risks. In the case of breast cancer prevention, most women go ahead and take the drug, but not without hesitation. That anyone would chose to take such a powerful drug without an absolute need is beyond logic and reason. My suggestion? Stop using steroids. Don't take the first drug -- won't need the second one.