Almost five years later, the memory is still as vivid as if it were happening now as I tell you that while showering, I discovered a lump in my breast. My hand stopped, my breath caught, and my stomach clenched in terror. Instinctively, I knew I was in trouble. After mammogram, ultrasound, biopsy and the first of three surgeries, the diagnosis of breast cancer was not the most optimistic one. My lobular breast cancer had spread beyond the breast into lymph nodes -- and perhaps elsewhere not yet clearly detected.

I would spend the next four years peering over my shoulder, wondering if the shadow of death would visit me with another cancer diagnosis, and if so, where would it settle in this time. If I ate pizza topped with jalapenos for that extra kick of flavor and got a stomach ache, I wondered -- had cancer spread to my liver? If I spent a day met with seemingly endless frustrations and annoyances and got a headache -- had the cancer spread to my brain?

While there is nothing rational about these leaps to a cancer conclusion based on evidence suggesting I suffered from logically explainable modern life maladies that antacid or aspirin might easily cure, for the newly-diagnosed surviving breast cancer, it is not uncommon for the mind to immediately race to an impending cancer-based doom for every day aches and pains. I am here to tell you that for the first few years it will be quite normal to have totally unreasonable fears.

Not willing to subject myself to this screeching fingernails on the blackboard fear without finding something to muffle the sound, I began creating personal rituals that suggested hope and affirmed life. With each one I was stating the value of my life and staking my claim to my future. For each woman, the personal rituals will be different. Here are a few I created that might give you some ideas for your own:

Survivor Crop, hosted by Ever After Scrapbooks, is an annual 24 hour scrapbooking marathon to raise money for breast cancer.

Now in its fifth year, participants come together to scrapbook, attend classes, play games, hold a raffle, enjoy catered breakfast and dinner, receive a Survivor T-shirt and scrapbooking freebies.

Breast cancer survivors attending will be telling their stories and the organizers promise a few scrapbooking surprises during the event.

In the last four years this event has raised over $116,000 dollars for the San Diego Affiliate of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation and the National MS Foundation, and each year the event gets bigger. The first one was held in a tent in the parking lot of the Ever After Scrapbooks store. This year's event will be held indoors in a much larger area on October 21st and 22nd. Each year, an Ultimate Survivor is chosen. For more information, visit the Ever After Scrapbooks website and the Survivor Crop blog.

Writer Richard Morris of www.breadandmoney.com coins the word nutritainment in a recent article about foods that are hyped to magically make us healthy -- foods that can cancel out cancer and wipe out heart disease. Nutritainment is nutritional news delivered in entertainment-like fashion, designed to urge consumers to buy into the latest, greatest super foods. Yet making small changes in diet -- what most consumers will do -- to incorporate these so-called powerful products is unlikely to do much good, Morris says. And he offers some thoughts on why the media continues to force this news down our throats and why we continue falling for their tactics.

Morris says human nature and marketplace economics motivate those engaged in nutritional sciences to strive for media attention and exposure. As a result, bits and pieces of nutritional studies make their way to medical journals and then land in media's lap through press releases. Some will even ghostwrite nutrition articles to promote products. These articles end up in the hands of the media and spread like wildfire to the public, in as-is format. Consumers may be left with the notion that these bits and pieces are important, relevant, non-biased research -- when this is not the case.

Morris says knowledgeable health experts who have the time to accurately report on important nutrition news are scarce. And when they do have time to share words of wisdom that really do matter, the packaging of the news is often technical and not so sensational. A headline that reads, Pomegranate juice packs power to prevent cancer will bury a scientific -- yet more accurate -- headline. Catchy headlines grab readers, and readers buy products. But headlines can be misleading -- and pomegranate juice alone is not likely to have many health benefits.

There are also issues with advertising and editorial content, according to Morris, who compares overall good nutrition to car maintenance. "Just like changing the air freshener in your car won't prevent a breakdown if the car desperately needs a tune-up, adding one item of magical food to your diet won't protect you from a breakdown either," he says and shares that a complete dietary makeover is what's necessary for good health -- that and stress reduction, physical activity, emotional balance, and life fulfillment. A quick dose of pomegranate juice may not do the trick. But a steady, consistent dose of these items will.

Adriene Hughes was diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after her 44th year of living. She found her lump after participating in a 5K walk, which for some reason, caused her breast to swell. The swelling led her to the lump -- and that's how she discovered her cancer. Adriene lives in Southern California, works as a media specialist, and spends her time taking photographs, knitting, and baking cookies and breads.

I have never met Adriene, have never spoken with Adriene. But we have communicated through our on-line journals and through e-mail ever since November 2004 -- when we each received a breast cancer diagnosis that changed the course of our lives forever.

Adriene is a gem, a treasure, a true inspiration. And here are her words.

When diagnosed with breast cancer, it feels as if, for the first time, your life has acquired an expiration date. Blurry and unreadable, still it is there, stamped on your consciousness. The surgeon is telling you what he needs to take away, the plastic surgeon is telling you what he can give you back. The oncologist is telling you about treatments and survival statistics. The radiologist is telling you about treatment and survival statistics. The counselor is there if you want to talk.

Statistics are good but limited in what they can predict with accuracy. What works beyond statistics? Why does a woman diagnosed with breast cancer -- who statistically fits into the group of women predicted to be surviving breast cancer ten years later -- does not make it that long; and the woman diagnosed with breast cancer -- who statistically fits into the group of women who have perhaps a year or less to live -- is still surviving breast cancer ten years later. Some of the answers might be found woven within the real experiences and stories breast cancer survivors have to tell.

Breast cancer survivors have stories to tell about their experiences, what they tried, what worked, what they are doing, what they did to create a quality of life, what they learned, the wisdom gleaned. Three breast cancer survivors work here at the Cancer Blog. Jacki Donaldson, Kristina Collins and myself. During October's Breast Cancer Awareness Month, we want to bring you the voices of breast cancer survivors. What they did, the advice they have, the hope they represent. We will be featuring breast cancer survivor interviews throughout the month in Survivor Spotlight.

While we are currently interviewing breast cancer survivors, we do not want to leave any one out who would like to share their experience, strength and hope. If you are a breast cancer survivor who would like to be interviewed, please contact us through the Cancer Blog Tips form and we will be in touch shortly.

According to Breast Cancer UK, maintaining a healthy weight is one of the best ways to reduce the risk of developing cancer. The organization is featuring the efforts of three women and one man as they chronicle their progress in the Ten Top Tips ten week weight loss program.

Led by specialist dietician Weight Concern Alison Chipperfield, the four volunteers Liz Ainsworth, Emma Russell, Stacey Delaney and Mike Chapman will share the personal efforts of losing weight with diet and lifestyle changes in reaching a greater level of health. To follow the weekly updates, visit Ten Top Tips Reduce the Risk.

Cancer Research UK also features a Healthy Eating area of the organization's website highlighting comprehensive information and resources in cancer prevention through diet and healthy eating tips.

According to Cancer Research UK, "Experts think that about a quarter of all cancer deaths are caused by unhealthy diets and obesity. Our diet influences our risk of many cancers, including cancers of the colon, stomach, and breast. You can reduce your cancer risk by eating a healthy, balanced diet that is high in fiber, fruit and vegetables, and low in red and processed meat and saturated fat."

Through support in funding, Cancer Research UK is involved in the EPIC study. The study -- called the European Prospective Investigation into Cancer and Nutrition (EPIC) -- is an enormous undertaking involving 521,483 individuals in 10 different European countries. EPIC is unique because the populations being tracked are so diverse in eating habits. But this is precisely what gives the study the advantage it has in making comparisons and noting trends.

As women facing the challenges of a breast cancer diagnosis and the triumphs of living beyond breast cancer, we share our stories and ourselves in the hope that it will help other women facing the same challenges in the fight to survive breast cancer and the special issues of breast cancer survivorship.

Beginning today, and lasting through October, AOL People Connection's Think Pink! will be featuring breast cancer prevention, diagnosis, treatment and survivorship resources within a dynamic interactive online community for women to learn about breast cancer, share their breast cancer story and make connections with other breast cancer survivors.

When you visit Think Pink! you will discover a blog featuring personal stories of breast cancer survivors told in their own words; a gallery of inspirational photos submitted by women going through breast cancer treatment and women who are living beyond breast cancer; articles and educational information about breast cancer; special profiles of breast cancer survivors; shop for a cause pink products; how to join a letter writing campaign to increase federal funding for breast cancer research and enhance the involvement and influence of trained breast cancer consumer advocates in all aspects of breast cancer policy and research; sign up for a breast check monthly reminder; learn about ongoing breast cancer events; and more.

While there, you are invited to share your story, submit a photo, start your own blog or create an AIM page.

Caregivers are quiet heroes, helping and caring without asking for anything in return. Caregivers step in when there is a need and they bring with them a sense of hope and comfort during the challenges facing a loved one diagnosed with cancer. In the selflessness of love, they sometimes forget to take time to care for themselves. To avoid caregiver depression, frustration, resentment, illness and burnout, here are six ways a cancer caregiver can care for themselves while caring for someone else:

Take a daily walk. Exercise is a great stress reducer. Taking the time to stroll through the neighborhood or local park is like a deep calming breath for the body and emotions. If you are a jogger, go jogging. The point is to get away for a moment, get the body moving, and enjoy a change of scenery as you go.

Keep a journal. Daily journaling is a way to outwardly express your thoughts and emotions and can act as a relief value for emotions that are building up inside. It can also give you a better perspective. Sometimes we need to see what we are thinking and feeling to sort it all out.

Pursue personal interests. If you have a hobby or activity -- like writing poetry, photography, crafts, painting, knitting, reading, gardening, or listening to music, that has always been fun and brought you a sense of joy and contentment -- make time each day for your personal pleasurable pursuits.

Maintain friendships. We need our connection to others for the enjoyment of company and for comfort and support. Make regular weekly dates with friends and meet for coffee. Join a book club or start a book club. If there is a caregiver support group in your area, or a support group for families affected by cancer, consider joining.

Learn ways to relax. Try breathing exercises and muscle relaxation exercises. Schedule a massage. Take a weekly yoga or tai chi class. Cannot get away? Pop in a yoga or tai chi video and follow along.

Make your health a priority. Eat well-balanced meals, get plenty of rest, drink plenty of fluids. Find inspirational quotes that lift your spirits and display them where you can read them each day. Remember to laugh each day. Hug and be hugged.

To offer the very best care for your loved one, you must take care of yourself too. It's not selfish, it's wise.

If you are a caregiver that has found unique fun ways to take a moment to take care of yourself while taking care of someone you love, please share your ideas with other caregivers in the comment area following this post. If you are a reader with fun tips or ideas on ways a caregiver can take care of themselves while caring for someone else, please share in the comment area. We are all in this together, and we will get through the challenges and struggles of cancer much better with each other's support and encouragement.

Stuffing your emotions, or keeping it all inside, has led more than one person down the path to trouble. At some point, if you do not express your thoughts and feelings, especially the negative ones, you stay emotionally frozen in time. It's kind of like physically clubbing yourself over the head repeatedly day after day. Of course, we cannot go around randomly screaming at people or speaking before we give ourselves time to think. There are effective ways to open up and share that will lead you to better health and help you to maintain a good relationship with family members and friends at the same time. Journaling is good, as is talk therapy or belonging to a support group.

The point is, until expressed, you are stuck with whatever you are feeling. With the passage of time, you might not even be aware of the emotions you are carrying around inside affecting you and your health, as they tend to pile up and become obscured from view.

Adelaide University psycho-neuro-immunology researcher Vikki Knott understands the benefit of letting it all out emotionally, and that sharing and releasing distressful emotions can help a cancer survivor survive cancer longer. Knott will be conducting research in emotion-focused treatments to improve cancer survivorship by charting the physical changes to the immune system before and after talk therapy sessions.

According to Knott, "It's about the link between the mind and the body and how your mind state can affect the disease state in the body." The researchers will be examining three techniques -- journaling, meditation and hypnosis. Previous research has already proven that breast cancer survivors who belong to a support group tend to live longer than their more isolated and disconnected counterparts.

I found Sark long ago -- about 10 years ago when I was working with college students on a campus in Virginia. Part of my job was supervising Resident Assistants -- students who live and work on the residence hall floors and are responsible for building community among residents -- advising them and counseling them and mentoring them and stepping in when conflict and trouble arises. It's a tough job -- being a peer and being in charge at the same time -- and Resident Assistants receive intensive training on how to best manage a floor of students possibly living away from home for the first time. I got to train these student leaders at times -- and Sark's books helped me motivate, inspire, and get to know these individuals. And over the years, as I assumed other jobs and roles and purposes, I found that Sark was still a great companion for me. And now I realize that what Sark has to offer really applies to anyone looking for a little inspiration, a little direction, a little creativity, a little delight.

The doctor was a friend. When he learned I had been diagnosed with cancer, he leaned towards me and said, "Stay close to nature."

Connecting to the cycles and seasons of nature; smelling the rich earth held in the hand; tasting time that does not go too fast or too slow but is eternally measured in the spaces of now; this is where the convergence of the physical and spiritual worlds meet most directly and I find myself standing in the middle with an awareness that any separation was only a misunderstanding on my part. To remember life, sometimes you need to find your way back to its most natural forms.

There is something about reading stories about other cancer survivors that helps me in moments of despair. Sometimes I look to the blogs that I read regularly -- blogs that capture the essence of realities that are not my own -- and I feel somehow comforted. I gain perspective and can remove myself a bit from my own turmoil. I gather strength and hope from others who struggle like me. I absorb the words written in these journals and see the photos of real people with real struggles and the big picture becomes clear to me -- breast cancer is widespread and far-reaching. And because of this, I have a lot of company of my path of uncertainty. This is what soothes me.

Books help me too -- the kind of books with little snippets of advice and wisdom from other survivors. Like Hope Lives! The After Breast Cancer Treatment Survival Handbook. My favorite chapter is about recurrence. There are passages from women who have had breast cancer two and three times and these strong women remind me that I if necessary, I can fight again and again and again. This book is humbling, sobering, and powerful. The voices that inhabit the pages put a bounce in my step and peace in my head. Hope does in fact live.

Jeannette, a breast cancer survivor who blogs Two Hands, in addition to being the founder of the Traveling Hope Project, has uploaded the first scanned images of the traveling journals. The Traveling Hope Project began as a conversation between bloggers who maintain cancer blogs, as an idea for creating community journals that will be shared as part of a real world traveling exhibit to bring awareness to the personal life experiences of those touched by cancer. Eventually, copies of the journals will be mass produced and distributed to cancer patients and their families, at no cost. All who have been touched by cancer are invited to contribute to the journals. Be sure to take a visit and see the personal artwork and wonderfully handwritten entries.