My friend -- who has a friend newly diagnosed with brain cancer -- greeted me at the door the other day and asked with a sense of urgency, "How can I help?"

"Help your friend?" I asked.

"Yes, she said, unsure of what she might say or do in this time of great difficulty for everyone involved.

I told her a few things. And then I thought of some more. It wasn't terribly easy to come up with these ideas. Because even though I myself was on the receiving end of help during my cancer journey, it's still hard to imagine what an individual wants or needs -- or doesn't want or need. But here's what I've got to offer.

I hope this helps my friend.

I hope it helps you too.

• Allow your loved one to take the lead. If you sense this person wants to talk, then talk. If you sense talk is not welcomed, then don't talk. To determine whether or not your friend or family member wants to discuss cancer, approach the topic and judge the response you get. I know I can usually tell if someone is willing to open up -- typically the conversation just flows -- and when someone is putting the brakes on chit-chat -- typically the conversation falls flat.

• If talk is not in the cards, then consider an offer of food. Sometimes actions speak much louder than words. So think about calling a restaurant in your friend's town and ordering a meal to be delivered right to the door. Most eating establishments accept credit card numbers over the phone so location should be a non-issue. Even those deep in despair need to eat, and taking away the chore of cooking and cleaning up can be quite a gift.

• If the gift of food is not up your alley, how about sending a small gift, like a candle, a pair of cozy socks, a grocery store gift card, a music CD, a gift certificate for a spa. You name it, your special something might brighten the day.

• If you live near your loved one and have some free time, offer to drive to appointments, visit during treatments, pick up kids and entertain them for the day, clean house, cook, and clean up dinner. Try to be very specific with your offers. Say, "I'd like to pick up your kids tomorrow at lunch so you can take a nap" or "I'm coming over on Sunday to rake leaves." These offers are easier to accept than the "call me if you need anything" kind.
  

• If a quick stop at your loved one's house is possible, drop off a book on the front porch or set some pretty potted flowers by the door. Or do both. Then walk away without saying a word. Let your help take your friend by surprise.

• When you do have the chance to talk, avoid guiding the conversation with your own thoughts and advice, unless requested. Saying, "Everything will be OK," for example, may not be true. Assuring your friend she will sail right through chemotherapy may backfire if nausea and fatigue are just down the road. Stating, "it's OK, your hair will grow back," doesn't really help those living with the horror of hair loss. So stay away from promises and predictions and stick to the present. Ask questions, listen, and paraphrase back what your friend has shared. These are basic counseling techniques. The premise is that allowing the person to work through the issues is more important than what we can do to directly help.
  

• Don't forget about the good old greeting card or short note that lets your loved know how much you care. Let the card say it if you wish to avoid writing and then add an address, a stamp, and send your support on its way.
  

• This makes eight -- so much for sticking to my Sunday plan -- but I must share this too: Don't forget about your loved one after months and even years pass by. Initial diagnoses are tough and treatments are tough too. But as your friend survives each day, remember to check in. Cancer is a life-long battle for many. Support and assistance may be just as valuable a year down the road as it is on day one.

It's been reported before and sadly, it's still true -- African-American cancer death rates are higher than for the overall population.

A new report from the American Cancer Society reveals the death rate is 35 percent higher in African-American men and 18 percent higher in African-American women. Lung cancer is the most common cause of cancer death among this population.

While the cancer plight of this group is improving, African-Americans are still more likely to be diagnosed at later stages of the disease. And late diagnosis often translates into a decreased chance for survival.

We all know breast cancer strikes women -- a lot of women -- but about 1,700 men also develop the disease each year in the United States. And while their risk of diagnosis is much more hopeful than the reality facing women, men with breast cancer face their own version of a not-so-rosy reality.

According to researchers at the University of California, Irvine, men treated for breast cancer face a very real chance of getting cancer again. Their study found that 11.5 percent of men with breast cancer develop second primary cancers -- mostly in the breast, stomach, and skin -- within two months following initial treatment.

"Even more disturbing, we found that men with breast cancer are diagnosed with later-stage disease and that patients with onset of the disease at a young age are even more likely to develop a second cancer," said Hoda Anton-Culver, chief of epidemiology in the UCI School of Medicine.

In light of these findings, researchers recommend men with breast cancer be closely monitored for a second onset of cancer.

Survival for childhood cancers has increased dramatically over the years. Researchers are now evaluated long term side effects from childhood survivors of brain tumors and leukemia who received cranial radiation therapy (CRT).

A clinical trial was conducted that evaluated the risk of stroke later in life among survivors included 37 patients who had been diagnosed with leukemia and 63 patients with brain tumors that had been treated with CRT. Their rates of stroke were compared to stroke rates of their siblings who had not been diagnosed with childhood cancer.

The researchers concluded that increased doses of CRT increase the risk of a stroke later in life. Patients who have received prior CRT may wish to speak with their physician regarding their individual risk of a stroke.

A publication in the Journal of Clinical Oncology says that the expression of HER3 is associated with a significantly worse survival in patients with ovarian cancer. HER3 is a component of the epidermal growth factor receptor (EGFR). The EGFR pathway is a biologic pathway within cells that is involved in cell growth and replication.

Ovarian cancer is considered to be a deadly cancer because a majority of patients are not diagnosed until they reach the later stages. Once the cancer has metastasized it is much harder to treat. To allow treatment to be more individualized the researchers wanted to know if HER3 expression can detect a more aggressive cancer.

This information can lead to patients pursuing more aggressive treatments or participation in a clinical trial evaluating new therapeutic approaches.

Even though its always promising to find out new information, I would be much more excited to hear that there are better detection methods for ovarian cancer in the early stages. They might find a way to block the expression of HER3 but as in breast cancer with HER2 over expression and Herceptin it never seems to pan out to be the miracle cure we are hoping for.

Its better to nip that cancer in the bud!